April, 2024
"Going in New Directions: Pain and Pleasure"
Dear Neighbor,
Life is full of surprises, and sometimes we get caught off-guard. Sometimes a surprise is planned, anticipated with delight—a trip to a dream place, a gift, a meal. But how many times has a “surprise” completely undone you when first presented to you? A job loss, a need to change careers, a hard decision to end a relationship, difficult news about a family member, a business you’ve made a long-term commitment of both time and funds, that proved to be a wrong decision?
Count the number of times in your life thus far that you’ve had to pivot, regroup, and go in a new direction. Actually take the time to make a written list with a few brief words to remind yourself (sometimes with a chuckle and sometimes with a pat on your back). I did this exercise and immediately came up with ten big ones. I won’t describe them to you, but at the time they were beyond momentous. It’s then I remembered a life lesson one of our great mentors shared with us. He said: “Everyone will get knocked down at some point in their lives. Ninety percent spend the rest of their lives on their knees, or at least remain damaged by the blow. Think of a prize fighter in the ring getting knocked out and down for the count. And we see the boxer out cold on the mat while the ref counts. Then he shakes his head, opens his eyes, pulls every ounce of determination out of his(her) core, and manages to get on his(her) knees while the ref is still counting down. And then he/she staggers to his(enough!) feet, dizzily circles his opponent, staggering, and then WHAMMO! throws a punch that knocks his opponent out cold. The fight is over.”
And because they got back up and fought past their pain, their names are remembered forever by the world: Rocky Marciano, Sugar Ray Robinson, Muhammad Ali, Floyd Mayweather, Jr.—and our own beloved Rocky, aka Sylvester Stallone. Then our mentor said, “Decide what kind of a fighter you are going to be. Think of those inflatable clowns with weighted bottoms that a child loves because every time the child knocks it down, the clown bounces back up again, with that same big smile.”
So, when you are navigating a difficult time and a need to pivot, ask yourself, “. . .how can I use this to turn in a new direction that will take me where I want to go?” Now look at your list and ask yourself how many times those past pivots turned out well.
"Going in New Directions: Pain and Pleasure"
Dear Neighbor,
Life is full of surprises, and sometimes we get caught off-guard. Sometimes a surprise is planned, anticipated with delight—a trip to a dream place, a gift, a meal. But how many times has a “surprise” completely undone you when first presented to you? A job loss, a need to change careers, a hard decision to end a relationship, difficult news about a family member, a business you’ve made a long-term commitment of both time and funds, that proved to be a wrong decision?
Count the number of times in your life thus far that you’ve had to pivot, regroup, and go in a new direction. Actually take the time to make a written list with a few brief words to remind yourself (sometimes with a chuckle and sometimes with a pat on your back). I did this exercise and immediately came up with ten big ones. I won’t describe them to you, but at the time they were beyond momentous. It’s then I remembered a life lesson one of our great mentors shared with us. He said: “Everyone will get knocked down at some point in their lives. Ninety percent spend the rest of their lives on their knees, or at least remain damaged by the blow. Think of a prize fighter in the ring getting knocked out and down for the count. And we see the boxer out cold on the mat while the ref counts. Then he shakes his head, opens his eyes, pulls every ounce of determination out of his(her) core, and manages to get on his(her) knees while the ref is still counting down. And then he/she staggers to his(enough!) feet, dizzily circles his opponent, staggering, and then WHAMMO! throws a punch that knocks his opponent out cold. The fight is over.”
And because they got back up and fought past their pain, their names are remembered forever by the world: Rocky Marciano, Sugar Ray Robinson, Muhammad Ali, Floyd Mayweather, Jr.—and our own beloved Rocky, aka Sylvester Stallone. Then our mentor said, “Decide what kind of a fighter you are going to be. Think of those inflatable clowns with weighted bottoms that a child loves because every time the child knocks it down, the clown bounces back up again, with that same big smile.”
So, when you are navigating a difficult time and a need to pivot, ask yourself, “. . .how can I use this to turn in a new direction that will take me where I want to go?” Now look at your list and ask yourself how many times those past pivots turned out well.
March, 2024
“If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.”
Dear Neighbor,
Recently we watched an HBO/Max series called Newsroom. It was written and produced by Aaron Sorkin, and I fell in love with it. It was about a cable news network team that made a commitment to just report the news—no commentary, no opinionating, no snarky remarks or innuendo, just straight reporting. As someone who has lived long enough to have experienced the likes of Edward R. Murrow (cigarettes and all), Walter Cronkite, Peter Jennings, and the Huntley-Brinkley News of yore, I, like many, would prefer a format like the Newsroom show was. Cable news has been called by the Hollywood Reporter “. . .a species and profession with no love lost among American public.” I know, all men newscasters. But the news became a growing opportunity for women too, like Christiane Amanpour and Cokie Roberts and Barbara Walters. And who ever thought we’d be watching women holding the mic in the face of people like Jason Kelce. What seemed strange at first is now commonplace.
But getting back to Newsroom: the last episode caused me to cry. The boss they loved to hate, who crossed the line continually between the soft and lovable man and the hardliner news boss, Sam Waterston, had something very sad happen (no spoiler alert here) that wrapped up the series. I admire him for being able to portray the gay divorcee-but-still-friend of Jane Fonda in the series “Frank and Gracie” to the sharp district attorney in “Law & Order.” And then, because I hated for it to end, I made Bob watch the “inside the episode,”in which Aaron Sorkin made comments that also made me cry—as I realized how far downhill we as a society have allowed ourselves to slide. Here is what he said. I wonder how this will resonate with you:
“Decency—we are living at a time when we're not that nice to each other. It's one thing to point at the powerful and give them a little kick in the butt, but we do that now with each other, with ordinary people. Snark is too much of a currency. It's way too easy, and it's the idiot's version of wit. We're constantly trying to draw attention to ourselves with tweets. And I think that we want to think of ourselves as better than that. And we are. You don't need a suit of armor to be gallant. You can act like you have a suit of armor even if you don't have a horse. We can all just be a little bit better than we are. I would like to see a renaissance of decency.”
And then there was the ever-changing aphorism on the financial planner’s sign on Baltimore Pike in Concordville. “If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.” Maybe being vague is at least a beginning to finding the way back home. Happy election year!
Your neighbor,
Anne Pounds
Neighborly News February 2024
Higher Power?
Dear Neighbor,
We all have had a variety of wonderful sources to rely on for getting immediate answers to difficult questions like what the weather will be like this weekend, to when will the Eagles play again, to what time is it, to do I have the flu, to what’s the proper etiquette for a responding to a wedding invitation you don’t want to attend—almost any question. We’ve come to rely on Siri, Alexa, Google, Wikipedia, and WebMD. And more!
Well, I’m done with all that, and I’m teaching myself to go to a higher source. Her name is AI, and I like her already. My husband/partner Bob is doing a deep dive by reading thick books, subscribing to ChatGTP and using it in his work already, and listening to podcasts, all to learn how to pose the most relevant and proper questions to get the best answers. And now AI is what we are discussing most mornings over coffee. On Mother’s Day our son hand-delivered the most touching poem I could have dreamed of—he who doesn’t write much of anything. Tears were rolling down my cheeks at the thoughtfulness. As I read it aloud, Bob said triumphantly, “AI.” And our son burst out laughing. It is a four-stanza poem, beautifully composed. I reread it often and smile at how lucky I am to live with these two nerds.
I realize that AI will probably wreak total havoc on our election campaigns this year. I realize that AI is about to invade every part of our lives. I realize that the worldwide master of the ancient game of Go, which is considered much more complex than chess, has been beaten by AI, and that after AI played a day’s worth of the game, AI beat herself! Many aspects of AI are almost unfathomable. We can hardly believe it. For instance, I have been learning that SEO, or search engine optimization, will no longer be relevant. It will be vastly overtaken by AI.
It is worth delving into this deep subject and beginning to learn how to use it and how it will affect our lives—for the better, and the worse. AI can teach us how to improve water quality in a trout stream—and it can teach a hacker how to pollute it so no life can exist in the stream ever again. What if AI can teach us how to change the conditions of forests that create perfect conditions for forest fires, well in advance of a fire every occurring? Or if AI can construct a mini electric grid for every homeowner that makes our current and sometimes-massive power grids so vulnerable to cyberhacking? (I know, many already choose to live “off the grid,” but in its current iteration, a bit too rough for my everyday life. I want it easy.) What if AI can build affordable housing out of plastic bottles and clamshell containers salad greens come in? (I know, 3-D printers are now PRINTING complete homes that can be purchased and lived in very quickly, even out of “bio-based” materials that are completely recyclable.)
One thing that AI apparently is not so good at is the personal touch. . .bringing people together. . .building community connections. That will still be up to us. It's good for all of us to raise our awareness of both the good and evil AI will produce. Maybe there will finally be a cure for cancer and ALS. Maybe we will be overtaken by AI and ruled by a non-human creation trillions of times smarter than you or me. . .well, I doubt that😊.
E. Anne Pounds
President
WelcomeNeighborPa.com
610-742-9341
“If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.”
Dear Neighbor,
Recently we watched an HBO/Max series called Newsroom. It was written and produced by Aaron Sorkin, and I fell in love with it. It was about a cable news network team that made a commitment to just report the news—no commentary, no opinionating, no snarky remarks or innuendo, just straight reporting. As someone who has lived long enough to have experienced the likes of Edward R. Murrow (cigarettes and all), Walter Cronkite, Peter Jennings, and the Huntley-Brinkley News of yore, I, like many, would prefer a format like the Newsroom show was. Cable news has been called by the Hollywood Reporter “. . .a species and profession with no love lost among American public.” I know, all men newscasters. But the news became a growing opportunity for women too, like Christiane Amanpour and Cokie Roberts and Barbara Walters. And who ever thought we’d be watching women holding the mic in the face of people like Jason Kelce. What seemed strange at first is now commonplace.
But getting back to Newsroom: the last episode caused me to cry. The boss they loved to hate, who crossed the line continually between the soft and lovable man and the hardliner news boss, Sam Waterston, had something very sad happen (no spoiler alert here) that wrapped up the series. I admire him for being able to portray the gay divorcee-but-still-friend of Jane Fonda in the series “Frank and Gracie” to the sharp district attorney in “Law & Order.” And then, because I hated for it to end, I made Bob watch the “inside the episode,”in which Aaron Sorkin made comments that also made me cry—as I realized how far downhill we as a society have allowed ourselves to slide. Here is what he said. I wonder how this will resonate with you:
“Decency—we are living at a time when we're not that nice to each other. It's one thing to point at the powerful and give them a little kick in the butt, but we do that now with each other, with ordinary people. Snark is too much of a currency. It's way too easy, and it's the idiot's version of wit. We're constantly trying to draw attention to ourselves with tweets. And I think that we want to think of ourselves as better than that. And we are. You don't need a suit of armor to be gallant. You can act like you have a suit of armor even if you don't have a horse. We can all just be a little bit better than we are. I would like to see a renaissance of decency.”
And then there was the ever-changing aphorism on the financial planner’s sign on Baltimore Pike in Concordville. “If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.” Maybe being vague is at least a beginning to finding the way back home. Happy election year!
Your neighbor,
Anne Pounds
Neighborly News February 2024
Higher Power?
Dear Neighbor,
We all have had a variety of wonderful sources to rely on for getting immediate answers to difficult questions like what the weather will be like this weekend, to when will the Eagles play again, to what time is it, to do I have the flu, to what’s the proper etiquette for a responding to a wedding invitation you don’t want to attend—almost any question. We’ve come to rely on Siri, Alexa, Google, Wikipedia, and WebMD. And more!
Well, I’m done with all that, and I’m teaching myself to go to a higher source. Her name is AI, and I like her already. My husband/partner Bob is doing a deep dive by reading thick books, subscribing to ChatGTP and using it in his work already, and listening to podcasts, all to learn how to pose the most relevant and proper questions to get the best answers. And now AI is what we are discussing most mornings over coffee. On Mother’s Day our son hand-delivered the most touching poem I could have dreamed of—he who doesn’t write much of anything. Tears were rolling down my cheeks at the thoughtfulness. As I read it aloud, Bob said triumphantly, “AI.” And our son burst out laughing. It is a four-stanza poem, beautifully composed. I reread it often and smile at how lucky I am to live with these two nerds.
I realize that AI will probably wreak total havoc on our election campaigns this year. I realize that AI is about to invade every part of our lives. I realize that the worldwide master of the ancient game of Go, which is considered much more complex than chess, has been beaten by AI, and that after AI played a day’s worth of the game, AI beat herself! Many aspects of AI are almost unfathomable. We can hardly believe it. For instance, I have been learning that SEO, or search engine optimization, will no longer be relevant. It will be vastly overtaken by AI.
It is worth delving into this deep subject and beginning to learn how to use it and how it will affect our lives—for the better, and the worse. AI can teach us how to improve water quality in a trout stream—and it can teach a hacker how to pollute it so no life can exist in the stream ever again. What if AI can teach us how to change the conditions of forests that create perfect conditions for forest fires, well in advance of a fire every occurring? Or if AI can construct a mini electric grid for every homeowner that makes our current and sometimes-massive power grids so vulnerable to cyberhacking? (I know, many already choose to live “off the grid,” but in its current iteration, a bit too rough for my everyday life. I want it easy.) What if AI can build affordable housing out of plastic bottles and clamshell containers salad greens come in? (I know, 3-D printers are now PRINTING complete homes that can be purchased and lived in very quickly, even out of “bio-based” materials that are completely recyclable.)
One thing that AI apparently is not so good at is the personal touch. . .bringing people together. . .building community connections. That will still be up to us. It's good for all of us to raise our awareness of both the good and evil AI will produce. Maybe there will finally be a cure for cancer and ALS. Maybe we will be overtaken by AI and ruled by a non-human creation trillions of times smarter than you or me. . .well, I doubt that😊.
E. Anne Pounds
President
WelcomeNeighborPa.com
610-742-9341
Neighborly News January 2024
Those Darned New Year’s Resolutions!
Dear Neighbor,
I am still working on my 2024 New Year’s Resolutions—are you? I keep all my resolutions in my Evernote app, going back to 2013. It is gratifying to re-read and see how many realized goals have been achieved (mostly home improvement projects), and laughable to see how many other resolutions appear year after year, repeatedly. Let us say this: I haven’t achieved perfection yet. I am still working on getting off that last five pounds and getting my fitness level where I want it. My time management skills are still in woefully bad shape. When I was a young person in my first job, I discovered that I couldn’t seem to get in work mode till about 11 a.m., not always conducive to the office environment. So I went to work for myself when I was 26 years old. I still can’t get workified till 11 a.m. My inbox emails are up to 48,818. I am backsliding on that one. However, I did unsubscribe to about 20 in the last few days.
I do still make my bed every day, a resolution from several years ago. Sometimes I make it 5 minutes before I climb into it. I came from a chaotic household where dirty dishes sat on the counter for days; and when I was new to my own first apartment, I improved on that situation by (after several days) stacking all the dishes in the sink full of hot water and sprinkling Tide over the mess, then addressing the mess the next day. Now I never go to sleep unless my kitchen is clean and orderly. I call that a quantum leap.
So here is a new resolution that I will really have to work on, post-Covid: consciously getting with people socially once a week. Honestly, I never thought I would have to work at this. I am a social animal—and yet, I became a homing pigeon during Covid, and the well-worn path to home now leads to my (boring) hiding place. How about you? How’s it going with you? I want to overcome this.
I’ve been doing welcome visits in several of our four territories, and I keep meeting wonderful people. It’s helping me warm up to my key 2024 resolution. A few weeks ago, I met a woman who just lost her husband, and I have been able to connect her to several of her new neighbors I had also visited who are now looking after her. And I met a man and his wife who are crazy for catching crabs, and soon we are discussing crabbing hotspots on the Chesapeake—of which I know many. I am now constructing an email with my best recommendations, including marina and boat rental locations from my chart, and now he has invited me to come crabbing with them.
I’ve been seeing a Facebook ad for a local magazine that promises to connect you to the “right people,” “people of influence.” I don’t know whether a magazine can actually do that, but I do know that the “right people” for us are those who have just moved—from every walk of life, no matter their income, circumstances, walk in life, or politics. They are “right” in the sense that they’ve just moved and are looking for help and want to make new connections, which we are able to do because we are engagine one-on-one and sharing our best tips and some generous gifts and local community information: Where the library is, some great trails, dog parks, playgrounds, and events. It is our pleasure to do what we call “practicing community.” And it’s helping me in my 2024 New Year’s resolution. How about we all go out our doors and say hello to a neighbor? Or invite them over for coffee or lunch. It’s a step in the right direction. Happy New Year, and happy resolving.
Those Darned New Year’s Resolutions!
Dear Neighbor,
I am still working on my 2024 New Year’s Resolutions—are you? I keep all my resolutions in my Evernote app, going back to 2013. It is gratifying to re-read and see how many realized goals have been achieved (mostly home improvement projects), and laughable to see how many other resolutions appear year after year, repeatedly. Let us say this: I haven’t achieved perfection yet. I am still working on getting off that last five pounds and getting my fitness level where I want it. My time management skills are still in woefully bad shape. When I was a young person in my first job, I discovered that I couldn’t seem to get in work mode till about 11 a.m., not always conducive to the office environment. So I went to work for myself when I was 26 years old. I still can’t get workified till 11 a.m. My inbox emails are up to 48,818. I am backsliding on that one. However, I did unsubscribe to about 20 in the last few days.
I do still make my bed every day, a resolution from several years ago. Sometimes I make it 5 minutes before I climb into it. I came from a chaotic household where dirty dishes sat on the counter for days; and when I was new to my own first apartment, I improved on that situation by (after several days) stacking all the dishes in the sink full of hot water and sprinkling Tide over the mess, then addressing the mess the next day. Now I never go to sleep unless my kitchen is clean and orderly. I call that a quantum leap.
So here is a new resolution that I will really have to work on, post-Covid: consciously getting with people socially once a week. Honestly, I never thought I would have to work at this. I am a social animal—and yet, I became a homing pigeon during Covid, and the well-worn path to home now leads to my (boring) hiding place. How about you? How’s it going with you? I want to overcome this.
I’ve been doing welcome visits in several of our four territories, and I keep meeting wonderful people. It’s helping me warm up to my key 2024 resolution. A few weeks ago, I met a woman who just lost her husband, and I have been able to connect her to several of her new neighbors I had also visited who are now looking after her. And I met a man and his wife who are crazy for catching crabs, and soon we are discussing crabbing hotspots on the Chesapeake—of which I know many. I am now constructing an email with my best recommendations, including marina and boat rental locations from my chart, and now he has invited me to come crabbing with them.
I’ve been seeing a Facebook ad for a local magazine that promises to connect you to the “right people,” “people of influence.” I don’t know whether a magazine can actually do that, but I do know that the “right people” for us are those who have just moved—from every walk of life, no matter their income, circumstances, walk in life, or politics. They are “right” in the sense that they’ve just moved and are looking for help and want to make new connections, which we are able to do because we are engagine one-on-one and sharing our best tips and some generous gifts and local community information: Where the library is, some great trails, dog parks, playgrounds, and events. It is our pleasure to do what we call “practicing community.” And it’s helping me in my 2024 New Year’s resolution. How about we all go out our doors and say hello to a neighbor? Or invite them over for coffee or lunch. It’s a step in the right direction. Happy New Year, and happy resolving.